the discovery of a hidden talent in my son 2006.12.12
Posted by Hakuna in ohana ("family").3 comments
it’s every parent’s responsibility to discover, develop and encourage the things that your children are uniquely gifted in and/or have a passion to do. in that spirit, i’m re-publishing a hilarious post from a good friend’s blog — memyselfandbo’s Xanga Site — that is about my son, kaeden. enjoy…
**outdone by a six-year-old.**
so, awhile back, i showed you some pictures of the multiethnic staff conference we had in torrance, california. since i’m korean, i’ve always had a love/hate (more like hate/hate) relationship with my flatter-than-pancake nose. but when it comes to balancing a spoon on my nose, the flatty flatness comes in handy. observe:
up until now, i thought that i was special. usually, when i show people the flatty flatness trick, they’re amused or wowed. i make people laugh, and they tell me how great i am. some even try to do it themselves, fail, and then shower me with compliments like, “wow! i can’t believe you’re still single!” or “man, if i had a nose like that, i’d be rich.” and i, of course, in a very humble asian manner, reply “oh thank you. i know i am quite awesome, and i hope that all of you will strive to be like me. who knows? one day, balancing a spoon on your nose may save your life!”
BUT…
i HAD to start working for intervarsity. i HAD to meet the hiratas, a super-friendly and hug-loving family who live in madison. keith, the alpha male of the family, works as the associate director of training in the national service center. amy, a physical therapist, is one of the nicest women i’ve ever met. their kids? adorable. at least i thought they were adorable, until now.
meeting the hiratas meant meeting their six-year-old son, kaeden. kaeden is now my number one enemy. observe:
look at that technique! four spoons at once!? i even heard a rumor that his parents may pay for plastic surgery, so that his ears have more surface area on which to add two more spoons!!!
my hopes have been shattered; i am now a broken soul. my dream of being the life at every party has been stolen by a six-year-old. sure, he looks innocent; sure, he looks cute. but watch out, when you’re not paying attention, he will slam you like a fat man doing a belly flop. observe:
so, any suggestions on which circus i should contact?
playing catch with my son 2006.11.01
Posted by Hakuna in addictions, christian, hope, ohana ("family"), sports.3 comments
this fall, i’ve been co-coaching my son’s t-ball team comprised of four, five and six year olds. i wish i could say that it has been nothing but sheer joy to help nurture the physical and character development of these young boys, but in truth, i cannot. the only part that i have really enjoyed so far is getting to watch kaeden grow and thrive.
i’m discovering that kaeden is actually quite coordinated and easily the best player on his team if not the league! (i wish you could see the prideful grin on my face and oh, if you’re one of the parents of the other kids in the league, my apologies.)
let me clarify: it’s not that these kids are particularly uncoordinated and athletically challenged. most four year olds and many five year olds are simply not developmentally ready to learn t-ball or any team sport for that matter. so, the majority of my “coaching” this season can be accurately described by my having to simply say,
stop playing with the dirt and keep your eyes on the ball!
about 10,002 times each game & practice. alas, it is an exercise in futility because many of the boys continue to be more intrigued by the dirt in the infield than the little white ball that the game is actually centered around.
that being said, as i watched kaeden throw, catch and hit the ball last week, it reminded me of an experience i had with him 3 years ago.
the chicago cubs were in the 2003 major league baseball play-offs for the first time in years and they were actually doing extremely well. (you may recall this because it only happens about once every quarter century — they’ve only had one back-to-back winning season since 1971-72.)
anyway, as kaeden (3-1/2 years old at the time) and i sat there one evening watching the cubies out-perform their post-season opponent, he went and got a ball and we started to play catch in between innings. he was a quick study (to my delight) but many of the balls he threw somehow flew backward landing behind him instead of flying forward toward me. catching the ball proved to be even more challenging for him, but he was trying very hard and occasionally, he would catch it — more from the accuracy of my throw than his dexterity though.
that night, regardless of whether he threw or caught the ball very well, i’d give him a high-five and praise him effusively for every attempt. the cubs won that night, but the deeper joy i experienced that evening was from the interaction i had with my most precious son.
that next morning, i had to get up early because i was leading a weekly sexual addictions support group for men at our church. a young man, let’s call him “sam” for convenience here, was downcast in spirit because he had failed in his area of addiction for the umpteenth time. as i silently asked god for wisdom in how to comfort “sam”, the lord gave me a flashback to my prior evenings interaction with kaeden. after describing that evening to him and the rest of the group, this is what i said,
of course god takes sin very seriously. so seriously, in fact, that jesus was willing to sacrifice himself for us! but god is also our father and as our father, he loves us and sees us as his most precious children.
i am not patient by nature, but last night, i was able to celebrate and cheer kaeden’s every attempt at throwing and catching the ball regardless of his level of success. why? because i knew that one day in the not-so-distant future when he turns eleven or twelve years of age, he will be throwing that ball right at me with speed and acuracy 19 out of 20 times and that his catching the ball will seem automatic.
if i had screamed, ‘what the hell are you doing kaeden? i showed you step-by-step how to throw and catch the ball just a few seconds ago! why can’t you just do what i said?’ at him, he would have either fallen to the ground weeping or stomped off angry. either way, i would have wounded his soul and he would have had little if any desire to re-engage with the activity of learning to play baseball in the future.
again, i know that god takes sin seriously, but could it also be that because he knows that we are growing into perfection, he patiently cheers us on every time we fail?
before becoming a father, i saw god as a frowning judge who was more often disappointed by my performance than pleased by my existence. this is how “sam” was seeing the lord that morning. i now know this is completely false! a deeper understanding of god’s word and my experience as a dad have shown me that god our father is always cheering us on and encouraging us to continue on the path of growth. he knows what we are becoming and therefore sees us ever so clearly as we are and as we will be.
kaeden is still only six years old but he’s already looking more and more like that eleven or twelve year old playing baseball that i imagined that autumn night just three years ago.
(unfortunately, the chicago cubs didn’t go on to win the league pennant that year! even god my have lost hope and patience with them by now.)
apologies to peyton manning & the indianapolis colts 2006.10.21
Posted by Hakuna in racism, sports.1 comment so far
through the kind comments of two indianapolis colts fans, i have been informed that the chicago bears are not the only
undefeated team in pro football
as i stated in my previous entry. the colts are also undefeated and so i offer my humble apology to peyton manning and the colts as well as all colts fans out there.
i intended no disrespect and as a word of explanation: i came upon that notion because i heard one of the announcers on monday night football say that the bears were
the only 6-0 team in football.
well, the colts are 5-0 because they had a bye week last week.
under normal circumstances, i would have hoped for the bears to be the only undefeated team after this weekend, but since the colts are playing the washington redskins (2-4) this weekend (a team i love to hate because of the offensive nature of their nickname — but that’s a topic for another day),
go colts!
chicago bears rally for improbable comeback victory 2006.10.17
Posted by Hakuna in sports.3 comments
i know that most of you won’t care one iota about this little post, but since i just finished watching the bears comeback from a 20-0 halftime deficit in stunning fashion, i had to express my excitement somewhere.
monday night football games have rarely been good for the bears in the 30-some years that i have been watching and cheering for them and this was looking like another display of football futility for them on this national platform. somehow though, the defense and special teams play pulled out an improbable victory.
the game ended 24-23 and the most remarkable statistic for the game was that the bears failed to score a single offensive touchdown! games like this are what make being a sports fan so much fun. they also create challenging and hopeless situations (albeit relatively unimportant ones) that are overcome by grit, sweat and sheer desire. there’s a life-lesson in that somewhere.
being a lifelong fan of chicago sports is more often than not a test of one’s mettle and loyalty, but it’s games and seasons like this that make being a sports fan so much fun. the bears are now the only undefeated team in pro football and for the first time since the superbowl team of the mid-80s, there is a real hope for a meaningful post-season.
trust me, i am fully aware that we are not even halfway through the season, but whether elation or despair awaits me in january & february, i am going to savor every victory and enjoy the anticipation of what this team might possibly aspire to.
columbus day: day of celebration or shame? 2006.10.09
Posted by Hakuna in ethnicity & culture, justice, racism.5 comments
my earliest memory of celebrating columbus day was in third grade. all the kids from grades 3-5 commemorated the day by dressing in colonial style clothing (i wish i had a photo of me at eight years of age in knickers and my mom’s frilliest blouse to post for you!) and spent the day learning about columbus and the earliest settlers. we did everything from writing on slates with chalk to hand-making ice cream and it was an absolute blast! it was teaching and learning (through experience and fun) at its best! unfortunately, now as an adult, i’m not sure that the foundation to what i learned was all that accurate!
looking at history is never simple! winston churchill was absolutely correct when he said,
history is written by the victors.
but with that stated, it is often difficult to navigate through various and contradictory historical sources to find truth. most of us in the united states have been taught that christopher columbus was a great explorer/adventurer and that he courageously proved wrong the popular belief that the earth was flat. he is also the “discoverer” of america and a heroic figure to admire, emulate and remember. he is of such national import, that he is one of only ten federal holidays defined by law. since this reflects the “normal” way that columbus is taught and remembered, my focus in this post is on what most of us as school children were never taught.
the primary text that i will draw from is entitled, people’s history of the united states: 1492 to present by howard zinn. amazon’s editorial book description reads,
known for its lively, clear prose as well as its scholarly research, a people’s history of the united states is the only volume to tell america’s story from the point of view of — and in the words of — america’s women, factory workers, african- americans, native americans, working poor, and immigrant laborers.
in 1492, when columbus first arrived in the caribbean (thinking it was the indies), his very first act was kidnapping. here is a part of columbus’ log entry on that autumn day,
as soon as i arrived in the indies, on the first island which i found, i took some of the natives by force in order that they might learn and might give me information of whatever there is in these parts.
his barbarous act was unnecessary as later european observers described the arawaks of the bahamanian islands as much like the native peoples on the mainland, who were remarkable for their hospitality and belief in sharing. even columbus later described the “indians” he encountered like this:
they… brought us parrots and balls of cotton and spears and many other things, which they exchanged for the glass beads and hawks’ bells. they willingly traded everything they owned…. they were well-built, with good bodies and handsome features…. they do not bear arms, and do not know them, for i showed them a sword, they took it by the edge and cut themselves out of ignorance. they have no iron. their spears are made of cane…. they would make fine servants…. with fifty men we could subjugate them all and make them do whatever we want.
when columbus returned to europe thinking that he had succeeded in finding a shorter route to south asia, he exaggerated reports and promises to investors and so his second expedition was given seventeen ships and more than twelve hundred men – their primary objective was gold and slaves.
when they arrived back in the caribbean, they went from island to island capturing “indians”. columbus set up a base in haiti and proceeded to send numerous expeditions into the interior to look for gold, but they found none. since he had to fill up the ships returning to spain with some kind of dividend they began hunting. howard zinn writes,
in the year 1495, they went on a great slave raid, rounded up fifteen hundred arawak men, women, and children, put them in pens guarded by spaniards and dogs, then picked the five hundred best specimens to load onto ships. of those five hundred, two hundred died en route. the rest arrived alive in spain and were put up for sale by the archdeacon of the town, who reported that, although the slaves were ‘naked as the day they were born,’ they showed ‘no more embarrassment than animals.’ columbus later wrote: ‘let us in the name of the holy trinity go on sending all the slaves that can be sold.’
columbus and his men continued to believe that vast gold fields existed in haiti and so,
they ordered all persons fourteen years or older to collect a certain quantity of gold every three months. when they brought it, they were given copper tokens to hang around their necks. indians found without a copper token had their hands cut off and bled to death.
the indians had been given an impossible task. the only gold around was bits of dust garnered from the streams. so they fled, were hunted down with dogs, and were killed.
trying to put together an army of resistance, the arawaks faced spaniards who had armor, muskets, swords and horses. when the spaniards took prisoners they hanged them or burned them to death. among the arawaks, mass suicides began, with cassava poison. infants were killed to save them from the spaniards. in two years, through murder, mutilation, or suicide, half of the 250,000 indians on haiti were dead.
records indicate that by 1550, only 58 years after columbus first landed, only 500 arawak “indians” remained. the chief source that zinn uses to recount what happened on these islands after columbus arrived is from bartolome de las casas. las casas was a young priest who participated in the conquest of cuba and for a time, even owned a plantation with indian slaves, but to his credit he repented and became a vehement critic of spanish cruelty.
book two of his history of the indies relates the atrocities committed against the “indians” by the spaniards. here are a few excerpts from zinn’s book:
the spaniards ‘grew more conceited every day’ and after a while refused to walk any distance. they ‘rode the backs of indians if they were in a hurry’ or were carried on hammocks by indians running in relays. ‘in this case they also had indians carry large leaves to shade them from the sun and others to fan them with goose wings.’
total control led to total cruelty. the spaniards ‘thought nothing of knifing indians by tens and twenties and of cutting slices off them to test the sharpness of their blades.’ las casas tells how ‘two of these so-called christians met two indian boys one day, each carrying a parrot; they took the parrots and for fun beheaded the boys.’
when he arrived on hispaniola in 1508, las casas says, ‘there were 60,000 people living on this island, including the indians; so that from 1494 to 1508, over three million people had perished from war, slavery, and the mines. who in future generations will believe this? i myself writing it as a knowledgeable eyewitness can hardly believe it….’
the history books i grew up with said that columbus was the hero in a heroic adventure. they told me of no deceit, avarice, kidnapping, slavery, murder or genocide. the real story behind christopher columbus helps me to better understand how our country grew and developed in the manner that it did. it also helps me to understand how and why we, as a nation, operate in the ways that we do today. don’t get me wrong! i am extremely thankful to have been born in america and i believe in our country’s principles of “justice and liberty for all”. i dream of a day when this stated american value is truly descriptive of who we are as a nation domestically and internationally.
the first step in getting there is to acknowledge who we really are today and to do that, we have to understand the trajectory from where we have come.
dr. carl sagan said,
you have to know the past to understand the present.














Over 1/3 of the Federal Tax Goes to What?!!! 2007.04.18
Posted by Hakuna in social commentary.1 comment so far
this can be interpreted in many ways. some might think this is a reflection of the dangerous world we live in and in order to defend ourselves, this is the cost we must pay. others of you believe that this pathetic budgetary reality is due to our country’s predilection for self-interest and dominance in the world.
i am certain that the truth is somewhere in the middle, but no matter what you believe about the “why” for this amount of spending on war and violence, i hope that this percentage disturbs you deeply!
(i tried to look up an estimate for what the u.s. government will collect in federal income taxes this year but could not find anything to relay to you. if any of you knows this figure, please inform us by commenting on this entry.)